Our 4 yr old, before church, says, I don't want to go to church, church is boring. We have told the kids, no toys at church as it is a time to worship God and praise God with our church family. She often does not want to go to children's church and wants to sit with mom and dad. When she does go to children's church she loves it and has a great time, but she is adamant about not wanting to go. How do we encourage her to enjoy church and not have to drag her there? PS - the rest of our family is excited for church and it is a happy time getting ready. (I think MOSTLY our child LOVEs to be at home, but because of both parents working, we do NOT spend a lot of time at home.)

 J's Reply

Teaching children to enjoy church begins at home. The reason for this is that God created and established the family to be the place where children are raised up and taught. The church, including children’s ministry, builds upon the foundation of family worship, not in lieu of it. In fact one of the reasons God choose Abraham was his attitude towards his children.


19For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the LORD to do justice and judgment, that the LORD may bring upon Abraham that which He hath spoken of him." Gen 18:19


This is echoed in Deuteronomy where parents are commanded to instruct their children.


6And these words which I command thee this day shall be in thine heart;and thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down and when thou risest up.Deut 6:6-7


And again in Ephesians


4Fathers, do not irritate and provoke your children to anger [do not exasperate them to resentment], but rear them [tenderly] in the training and discipline and the counsel and admonition of the Lord. Eph 6:4 (Amp)


Start by holding regular worship times together as a family. This doesn’t have to be fancy or formal. Sing some songs and read from the Bible. Dad, part of your job is to be reading and teaching your kids from the Bible anyway, so this is a great time to do it. As you do, you can teach your kids how to sit still and how to listen in a friendly, low-pressure environment. As you build this time at home, transitioning to church becomes an extension of what you are already doing and will be easier for her. It will also be establishing some family time, which it sounds like she really needs.

L's Reply

It sounds like you may have an indication that this child's temperament and personality may have different needs than the others. She may need a little more quality time alone with her parents - like a date night. I would recommend that you rotate simple date nights between you and your husband between your children each week. They can be 1/2 hr. dates to the ice cream store, the park, picking flowers, etc.. Each child gets their special time. Other than that, it is developmentally appropriate for her to find adult church boring, it sounds like she is longing for time with you both and maybe finding some creative ways to give that to her will help curb the need to stay with you in adult church rather than go down to children's church.